Benson

Last night we all got to remember what we thought and felt five years ago when Benson joined our family.

Austin mostly remembers that Brother A. came over to baby sit at our house. Austin tried to teach him to play video games to no avail. They still have a private joke where Brother A says to Austin "you know, you're not too smart" and Austin says back "you know you're not too good at video games."

Dallin and Landon remember .

Jenna was barely walking (15 months) and was happy to share binkies with him.

I remember the night before the big day. I was completely exhausted from a pregnancy complicated with early labor and bed rest. I had gone into labor two and a half months early (30 weeks). I had spent three days in the hospital with the maximum doses of uterine-relaxing medicines pumping into my body. There was a moment when I heard someone's newborn baby cry next door and I thought "I really don't want to do this. That does not sound fun at all."

But then I had this little glimpse of Benson's spirit. Just for a second. And I felt peace. I really did. I felt sure that I could and would go through these hard things for that precious spirit. And I felt that having our fourth boy was of course the perfect thing.

So, that night before Benson was born, I sat on the couch downstairs and felt my rib cage stretch as his little foot pushed for more space (he was 9 lbs. 8 oz and 22 in.) as my belly continued to contract over and over again--as it had since those days in the hospital. I wondered if I would ever feel such a sensation again. I don't know how I could see through the discomfort but I recognized that it was such a unique blessing and experience. To know that I had a husband and children who were also ready and waiting for this baby was very comforting.

We are so, so thankful that Benson is who he is.