The day I fell in love...

I have to admit I have been a bit of a whiner this last week or two.

Up until this point I have been able to avoid most of the fun-pregnancy-related things that have afflicted my previous pregnancies. That is until about two weeks ago.  This last few weeks have brought on a wealth of fatigue, heartburn, nausea, swollen feet, stretchy joints, carpal tunnel and sleeplessness...need I go on?

My illogical pregnant mind fears that this might literally go on forever and suddenly a couple of weeks seem like unconquerable years. 

My ideal delivery would include a set induction date ( a week early?) with the anesthesiologist waiting in my hospital room. None of this water-breaking-at-home with a mad frantic dash to the hospital in excruciating pain. (We've done that twice...)  But I fear it is not to be.  

It seems I have the pregnancy version of the Plague. I am a VBAC.  (vaginal birth after cesarean) I have had two normal deliveries since Austin's large, posterior head and a failed forceps attempt forced a surgical delivery more than 11 years ago.  But still there is some increased risk of C-section if we induce labor. But not inducing labor increases the chance (and my worry) that I will have a giant baby and have to repeat the difficult labor that ends in the OR... So I wait and worry.

For some reason it has been hard to remember how much we have wanted and anticipated and looked forward to this little one...

So it was in this state of mind that I went to an ultrasound to check the size of the baby on Friday at 37 1/2 weeks.

Here's what we saw.

Instantly all my worries and complaints vanished.  I mean instantly.  My heart just wanted to burst with love the minute I was his little face. How could I have ever complained about carrying and sustaining the life of this cute little bundle?!

In that room I felt a rush of peace and calmness.  This little (7 lbs. 14 oz. !!) boy is worth any amount of discomfort.  Suddenly waiting a couple of weeks doesn't seem like such a big deal.  Not when I know what is to come.

37 at 37

I never thought I would be 37 weeks pregnant when I turned 37.  Crazy!  I am surprised how much I love the idea of having a baby now.  Back in my younger/wiser days I was sure that I would be the best mom if I have babies in my twenties when my body was healthiest...  While I agree that pregnancy and newborns were probably physically easier in my younger days, I love being a little wiser and more established.  Love it.

And I can not say enough about having older kids around to help out.  They can make dinner for themselves and me if needed.  They can clean their room and do their own homework.  And babysit.  Awesome!

We believe in being honest...

Today I walked outside into the backyard (actually I didn't make it off the steps...) where just two days ago I planned to plant so many beautiful flowers and trees...

I changed my mind.  I decided that it is all too much work.  I'm just going to buy a commercial size jug of season long weed killer and douse the whole place.  One look at the bumpy lumpy 40 year old lawn and all its faults sealed the fate.

Apparently our lovely pooch has taken his personal responsibility to recycle very seriously.  That big hole next to the soggy pile of mint is his personal attempt to assist me in my plantings.  He filled it with paper plates and {I believe} a naked barbie.  He didn't chew the barbie. Just took her on a sight-seeing trip.

It's a good thing he is cute and very sweet.  And soft. Because some days he is about to become a 'Lady and the Tramp" dog.  Any yes that is my belly in the way of the picture...

The Garden Spot.  Complete with squash that has been waiting to be harvested since last year. 

I have determined that growing babies and growing gardens are incompatible.  At least for now.

Bloomin!

Why is it that I am obsessed with the weather?

I love it when spring finally comes.  It distracts me from the inside of the house and gives me fun things to think about.  I  actually have a seed catalog that I often fall asleep reading.

I know just what vegetables to plant in the garden.  Last year we missed most of the garden harvest due to a really rotten case of morning sickness.  This year I can't actually reach the ground to plant any veggies but I have hope that I will have a baby here sooner than later.  Actually one month from now.  Crazy!

I have to admit I am looking at and planning flowers to keep my self from sinking into the last-month-of-pregnancy-I'm-sure-this-will-never-end state of self pity.

Here's what makes me smile...

1--A cutting garden.  Who needs vegetables anyway?  Especially when I have a father who cannot restrain himself from planting every color and variety of potato available.  This is going along the fence in my garden spot.  Cone flowers, echinacea, black-eyed susan, verbena, daisy, and I need some good filler plants.  I've actually rarely planted perennials because we have always moved so often.  I've decided not to wait any longer.

2-- Knockout roses.  I want these along the front of my house in front of the bushes we planted last year.  Ever read about these beauties?  Hardy, compact and disease resistant.

3-- Trees.  My boys are obsessed with trees.  I think they always have been. There is a beautiful weeping willow on the way to Dal and Land's school and they always say "Look at that tree!  How long will it take to get one of those?  I wish we could just transplant that big tree!"

London Plane

Look at that bark--it looks like a water color painting!  These trees are all over temple square in Salt Lake City.

Navajo Globe Willow

fast growing and not as messy as most willows.  Looks like a big umbrella!

Weeping Willow 

(though most landscapers insist that this is a messy disease prone tree.  It looks like a dancing girl and it is my first love in the tree world...)

And of course I can't go without a couple of 

Blue Spruce

I also need to thin the irises and plant some day lilies in with them so we can have blooms in the late summer as well as spring. 

Of course actually doing the work is harder than imagining but that's what kids are for right?!